S3 E14: The 12 Stages of Burnout
We usually think of burnout as a state of total collapse, but it can be much more subtle and sneak up without you even noticing, especially for those of us in creative fields where our work is so intimately important to us. Most musicians and artists have experienced it at some point, to some degree (including me).
I walk you through the 12 stages of burnout and share how many of the symptoms are behaviors rewarded by the culture of toxic productivity, how they can impact your creative work, and, most importantly, the key to breaking the cycle of overwork!
RESOURCES DISCUSSED IN THIS EPISODE:
Burned Out in Scientific American
More burnout info in Psychology Today (including links to find a therapist)
S3E13: Why We Resist Rest + How It Helps Our Creativity
4 Steps to Reducing Creativity in Your Creative Work - free video
TRANSCRIPT
Hey, everyone, welcome to Episode 14 of Being A Whole Person. Today, we're going to talk about burnout. Yes, it's kind of a buzzword, but things become a buzzword for a reason, because they're happening a lot. I know a lot of us are experiencing burnout right now. A lot of us have experienced it in the past. I think pretty much every musician or artist that I know has experienced it at some point in the past.
I feel really passionately about this because I've experienced it, and I didn't know what was happening at first. And I didn't know why or any of the factors that went into it, and it didn't have to happen that way. So that's why I do what I do. I am a coach of creative wellness, because I want to help keep you from being burned out as well.
I won't get into my entire story of burnout and anxiety in this episode, because I think it kind of needs its own episode, but I've definitely experienced it from varying degrees from “a little bit crispy” to more severe anxiety, where I had months where I was functioning, but just barely. So, if you relate to any of that, you're in the right place. It can be tough to even realize it's happening, like I said, because many of the signs of burnout are behaviors that are rewarded in our work oriented culture. With all of those external pressures and messages telling us to hustle and stay busy, you might be praised for some of these things.
So we should start with the real definition here. The World Health Organization defines burnout as a syndrome conceptualized as resulting from chronic workplace stress that has not been successfully managed, and yeah, I think that's a good definition, but it doesn't really encompass everything. Even this official definition relates back to work, which just reinforces how important we think work is.
There are definitely other kinds of burnout. You can get burned out from caretaking a family member, from parenting, from relationships, either with a significant other, or other relationships in your life. There are lots of things that can be a source of prolonged stress, that can lead to burnout, and it's that prolonged stress not going away, and not having relief from it that leads to the burnout. It, of course, affects our work. Of course, it affects your creative work, it affects your creativity, it affects your ability to solve problems. It gives you this distance, sometimes, from what you think is important.
So today, I'm going to walk you through the 12 stages of burnout, which were identified by psychologists Herbert Freudenberger, and Gail North back in the ‘80s. Of course, there's been a lot more research on burnout since then, but I find it still really helpful to hear about the stages presented in this continuum. I should also mention that Herbert Freudenberger is the person who coined the term burnout syndrome, back in the early ‘70s.
These 12 stages I've seen referenced all over the internet, but the best place that I've heard them talked about is this Scientific American article from 2006. It's behind a paywall, but I definitely found it helpful to go deeper in my research.
I also want to mention, in terms of work, burnout can happen from being under-challenged or neglected, but we're going to focus more on the overload type of burnout - the overwhelm, which is what most people think of when they think of burnout. These 12 stages are in a continuum, but they don't necessarily happen in order. Some of them could happen simultaneously. There might be other things that aren't on this list that you experience when you have burnout. But the way it's presented shows a logical progression, and, like I said, I think that's really helpful.
Number one is the compulsion to prove yourself, so, you are demonstrating your worth to your colleagues kind of obsessively, demonstrating it to yourself, also, that you are doing an excellent job. This often hits really high performing people. I know, if you're listening to this, you might be a recovering perfectionist, you might be a Type A overachiever type person, like me. We're really susceptible to this excessive ambition, they use the phrase “grim determination”.
If you are in this stage, you just look like you're doing great, you look like you're really high performing, and you're doing amazing work. That's rewarded by your boss, if you're in a workplace that's rewarded by our culture. And, of course, it can go too far and be a slippery slope, which we will continue to go down.
Number two is working harder and an inability to switch off. You can see how that's a problem, if you are not able to switch off. But again, working really hard makes you look like you're accomplishing things. It’s attached to worth in our society. You might be obsessed with handling everything yourself, so you look really irreplaceable if you're in a workplace.
But for those of us who work for ourselves, which is a lot of us doing creative work, this might show up as not wanting to ask for help, and just not being able to stop working. If you're feeling passionate about what you're doing, and you can't stop working, and you have ways to replenish yourself, that probably won't be a problem. But it's when you can't switch off and you're not doing the things that build you back up again, then you run into problems.
There's a kind of an inertia to this. When you are stuck in that state of inertia, it can be really uncomfortable to try to switch off. You might just want to stay busy, because that's what you're used to. It gives you that sense of control, which I talked about last week in the episode about resisting rest and why we do that. So go back and listen to that one, if you want to hear more about that.
We like feeling in control. We don't like feeling uncertain. So, continuing to work makes us feel like we are taking action, and we are taking action, but if we're overdoing it, clearly that can be a problem.
Stage Three is neglecting your needs. You might know that I talk about needs a lot. I personally have a practice, and encourage this practice, of asking yourself every day, “What do I need today?” I have a reminder on my phone for 7am every morning that says that. I usually think about it on my walk in the morning.
When you're neglecting your needs in this phase, you justify it because it's all just, “Oh, well, I have to sacrifice eating lunch because I have to keep working and that's more important. I have to sacrifice seeing my friends, or sleep, because it's just not as important as work. And of course, also a slippery slope.
But it is culturally acceptable to be like, “Oh yeah, I have to work, I can't come to that thing.” And I don't want that to be the norm. But it is kind of the norm, or normalized enough that it doesn't seem strange.
Number four is displacement of conflicts. So you're dismissing problems, you can tell something isn't quite right. You're not feeling great, but you can't necessarily tell why, and you can't necessarily find the source of it, because you don't really have the presence of mind to look that deeply. You're just focused on moving forward and getting all the work done, because there's so much to do. You might have a deadline.
It's also kind of a self protection mechanism, because it might be more threatening to your brain to know that there's something to fix, that something deeper might be wrong. So, it's easier to dismiss it, because then you can just keep going, inertia again. You might start to feel a little panicky, kind of jittery, the physical anxiety symptoms might be creeping up - that unconscious holding your breath, that not taking a full breath, your chest is a little bit tighter.
A lot of us recognize those as anxiety symptoms, but we also just might be too caught up in what we're doing to notice what is actually happening with our bodies, because that's not valued either. The work that you do and what happens in your brain is more important in these messages that we're getting.
Number five is revision of values. So this is a stronger version of neglecting your needs. You might feel bad if you're not doing something that's productive in a tangible, measurable way. I talk a lot about compassionate productivity for this reason, because the things that are not measurable can still really be productive, especially in the creative process. That's just how it goes, it might not always be measurable.
But at this phase, you would have this compulsion to always be doing something productive, even if you're tired. Even if you've put in 12 hours already that day, you still have this gnawing feeling that I got to keep, this has to be productive, I can't waste any time. And you start to dismiss your friends and family and your hobbies, because those things don't seem productive. Of course, work is the most important thing, and you can't see anything else.
Stage six, it's kind of building on stage four, denying emerging problems. So you're kind of noticing, “Alright, I'm having some problems, feeling some negative emotions.” But you just attribute this to all the pressure you're under with time, and deadlines, and the amount of work that you have. You don't really attribute it to, this is burnout manifesting.
You might start to see people you work or collaborate with in a more negative light. It might start to be harder to socially interact with them, because you're just worn down. You don't really have the energy to be compassionate to yourself or others, and that idea that you need to work just becomes more and more rooted, because you have given up so much for it, you are so devoted to it.
Stage seven is withdrawal. Your social life starts to become smaller, or more nonexistent, which I know now, in COVID times, it's a little different, because we're isolated already from that, and that's having an impact on your social life. You might be withdrawing more, even from the digital things, and you feel a need to get relief from the stress. You might be trying holistic things for this, you might be turning to substances, you're kind of starting, that habit is starting to happen.
You might be having kind of a loss of hope, or a loss of direction, which then we often blame ourselves for that, because we say, “Oh, I lack ambition. I'm not motivated enough. Why can I get myself to do the thing that I love doing?” Like, “Why don't I paint more, because I'm supposed to do that - I love it!” But if you're worn down, you might kind of forget that you love it. That's normal.
Again, there are so many factors with the state of the world right now that are making us feel burned out, we're burned out on news, we're burned out on uncertainty. There's a lot more compounding this. So you might recognize some of these, not from a workplace scenario, but just from the circumstances that we find ourselves in right now.
Number eight is odd behavioral changes that are starting to become obvious to your friends and family. They're starting to get worried about you, like, “Oh, wow, I think you're too focused on work. I think you're neglecting important things in your life.” They can really see that maybe your personality is changing, that you used to be really energetic and excited about your work, and now you're kind of either apathetic, or more withdrawn or fearful. It's starting to become visible to others, and not just yourself.
Then, stage nine is depersonalization. You're not seeing yourself or others as valuable. You're being very out of touch with yourself, you're kind of going through the motions. I call it survival mode. You can't perceive your own needs anymore, and that starts to get pretty scary because, if you can't even perceive what your needs are, there's no way that you can fulfill them or ask other people to fulfill them for you.
It's tough to ask for help if you don't even know what kind of help you need to ask for, and you don't really have energy to look to the future to make plans, goals, start new projects. Again, I know lots of us don't feel like we can make plans and look to the future in COVID times but I think this is applicable and just might be amplified right now.
Stage 10 is inner emptiness. You're feeling empty inside and to overcome it. You might be looking for some compulsive activity like overeating, sex, alcohol, drugs. Work can be a compulsive behavior, just something to make it so that you're filling the void with constant activity. That's really tough because it becomes even more of a vicious cycle, because you're not able to step back and be aware of what is going on.
Number 11 is depression. This is starting, these later stages are getting to be more of the common idea of what burnout is, because we view it as this more severe thing, even though there are so many shades that I already described that are more mild. When you're in this phase of depression, you're feeling lost and unsure. The future feels bleak. Most of us are familiar with these depression things. Even if we haven't experienced them, you can imagine that makes sense.
I've definitely felt this after finishing a big project, like when I released my album a couple years ago, it was so much constant work. It was great, I was really happy that I was doing that project. But when you finish, and suddenly the absence of that stress and stimuli is there, your mood plummets. Maybe that doesn't necessarily happen to everyone, but it can happen because, what goes up must come down. You're at this high level of stimulation, and then when the stress goes away, it just falls.
And that big thing was taking up so much of your energy and is suddenly gone. So you're like, Okay, something is missing, it's a little disorienting. And that was your purpose for a while, and then suddenly your purpose is gone. So it can feel kind of lonely and bleak to not know what is coming next.
And of course, the more severe forms of depression, you feel like your life is losing meaning. I want to say right here, these are the stages that you want to consult a mental health professional. I am not a mental health professional. I'm familiar with these things, but getting support in that way, might be an essential step.
Then phase 12 is burnout syndrome, which can include total mental and physical collapse. This is where you'd be seeking medical attention. I'm hoping it doesn't get that far. I'm here to stop you with those earlier stages, hopefully, so that it doesn't go all the way to phase 12.
Do you see yourself in any of these? If you don't know what you're looking for, if you're not looking at all of these symptoms as signs of burnout, it's easy to be like, “Oh, I just don't really like writing anymore. I'm not motivated to do it.” Or, “I'm not really good at this anymore. I'm stuck. I can't create anymore.”
Sometimes when we're having those feelings, we're just exhausted. We are just burned out. There's so many different shades of burnout. And you can see how the productivity equals worth culture really feeds into this.
There's also the whole tortured artist idea that romanticizes mental health struggles that many artists have, and many creative people have, but that is so harmful, because, as you probably feel or maybe have observed in your own life, being in the best physical and mental condition possible leads to better creative work, better creative flow, enjoying your life more, being happier. I say the best condition possible because I know we're all coming from different situations and conditions. I don't want to say that being in perfect health is making you a better person than someone who has other challenges. I just want to say that.
The tortured artist idea comes from a real place, but we don't have to be tortured in order to make good work. I know many of you probably don't buy into that idea. But just in case, I want to help dispel it., because I know when I'm anxious or depressed, I don't want to do anything. I don't feel like I can create, I don't have the mental space for it. It just doesn't work.
It's really tough as artists, because we are more sensitive, and that makes us more susceptible to burnout and anxiety. But sensitivity is a superpower. It makes you sensitive enough to do what you do. I know that if I weren't as sensitive as I am, I wouldn't be as good of a musician.
Sensitivity as a superpower also applies to your awareness of yourself. If you get in the habit of tuning into this stuff, you can be aware that these symptoms are happening, and you can be aware that hard work and the traditional idea of productivity can't be the be all, end all. AThat we really have to make time for rest and replenishment and pleasure.
So, obviously, you've been listening to this whole thing, you know, I'm here to spread that message. I'm here to normalize it, and I hope you'll do that too. Every time you think or talk about productivity differently, and tell yourself, “You can rest instead of pushing onward,” you're planting a seed.
That will pave the way for change in the future, even if you're not ready to make a big life change. Really, we can make big life changes, that's great. But it's those really small shifts that just keep going, that we can't even see at first, that can be even more impactful than the life overhaul that we think we have to do.
If you're recognizing yourself in any of these stages of burnout, please remember that not all hard work is going to lead to burnout, it depends on whether what you're doing is going to replenish you, whether you're pausing to refuel. That's how you break the cycle.
I invite you to ask yourself: What are the things that give you energy? What are the things that replenish your energy? What are the things that deplete your energy? I know, it requires patience to figure this out, and that can be really hard, especially when you're feeling exhausted and burned out, and you feel like everything's already taking a long time. It's really frustrating.
But in order to get out of burnout, you have to make time for more resting and taking a break as much as you can. It seems counterproductive, but it will actually help you move forward faster. Maybe we don't have to move forward fast, either. Maybe we can embrace taking a slower pace. That's great, too.
So for more tangible advice, I have this free video that I made called 4 Steps to Reducing Burnout in Your Creative Work. It has simple practices that really help you replenish your energy, and cultivate more self compassion while you're doing it. You know, that video has been really helpful for people.
I know that a video can only go so far, general advice can only go so far, so if you need more support than that, let's talk about it. We can get to the root of what is making you overwhelmed and pushing you towards burnout so that you understand how you function under the circumstances, and what happens to you personally, how your energy is affected by the stress.
You can always sign up for a free discovery call, no pressure, no strings attached, to see if coaching with me is a good fit. You'll definitely leave with at least one thing that you can put into practice right away. Even when it doesn't end up being a fit for coaching right away, I love meeting people and making sure that you leave, knowing that you have something to move forward. It's really fun. So that'll be in the show notes, both of those things will be in the show notes.
Lastly, those of you who are in the US, which I know is a lot of you, it's the end of October, Daylight Savings Time is about to end on Halloween, and then the election is just a few days later. This is a tough time of year with the waning daylight, and the election has been really tough on all of us.
I want to encourage you to make a specific self care plan around it. Just have a plan to do some extra stuff, just in case you need it. Whatever it feels like is going to replenish you, then maybe double the amount that you think you should do, or even more. Things have been so stressful, we might not have the results right away. It might continue to be stressful. Just have a plan.
Know that you have some stuff waiting and ready to go that you can turn to to help take care of yourself during this time.
Next week, I'm going to have an interview with Amy Kuretsky, who's a breathwork facilitator and health coach and acupuncturist. We had an awesome conversation that I think you will love. I always say that but I always love it, and I hope you do too. I'll also announce a new offering that I have coming up. So that's very exciting. I hope you all have a good week. Take a deep breath, do whatever you need to do to stay well, and I'm wishing you all the best!
Pianist and composer